What's wrong with today's society
Today's society has many expectations of us: Be strong, laugh a lot, do everything right. And because we hear and read each of these "rules", for example in social networks, it is almost a kind of peer pressure. We go through our lives with all these rules and norms in mind and don't even think about them. We're just trying to be like everyone else and please others.
We judge one another daily and draw wrong conclusions based on an image that we created in our minds. We do so much without thinking about it, we follow unwritten rules from an invented book written by today's society.
So why don't we think about the rules that we so easily follow?
Today's society says "Showing emotions is a sign of weakness"
Showing how you feel is not a sign of weakness. It's a sign of courage. We are all afraid of vulnerability and it takes strength to face that fear. Society today says we should be ashamed of showing our emotions and that we should hide them. But that's not true. Emotions are human, tears are human, and often they help one deal with feelings. I think it is not easy to show emotions because it lets you lower your own protective shield. And something that is not easy does not make you weak, but brave.
Today's society says "You have to try to impress others"
Everyone keeps telling you who to be and who not to be, but you don't have to prove anything to anyone but yourself. You don't have to impress anyone. You are here to live for yourself and live up to your own standards. The number of friends you have doesn't make you more or less valuable. Don't get used to throwing away who you are to make others happy. Surround yourself with people who like you for who you are and who don't try to change you all the time. Don't become part of the "fake is cool" trend.
Today's society says "If you laugh a lot, you are happy"
Is that really true? Do you know how many people hide their vulnerability behind a smile? Do you know that sometimes one of your friends just laughs at your jokes so as not to cry? A laugh can be real, of course. It can be a sign of happiness and contentment. But it's also an easy way to confuse others. We would be naive to believe that everyone who laughs is happy. That's why we shouldn't be afraid to just show our real feelings instead of hiding behind a laugh.
Today's society says "Hide your being different and be afraid of originality"
You should show, not hide, anything that makes you the special, unique person you are. We all have our idiosyncrasies, but these idiosyncrasies are the diamonds of our lives. Our idiosyncrasies bring us together. Don't hide your face Don't hide your talents. Don't hide your dreams. Don't hide your passions. Don't hide yourself. Be who you are, be unique - like a precious diamond. Walk with your head held high and be proud of yourself for who you are.
Today's society says "You mustn't fight, your life has to be perfect"
Again and again you see on social networks that you shouldn't show your weaknesses and that we should be perfect, but the only thing we all have in common are our defeats, the struggles that we wage with ourselves and the perfectionism of society . We try to pretend that our life is perfect. We only show the good things that happen in our life and leave out everything that doesn't make us perfect. But we're only human. We make mistakes, we learn and we grow. We should never be perfect or all the same. So I say we can fight, we don't have to be perfect. We should stand by our mistakes and show others the real self, not a perfected version of ourselves, so that everyone finally stops trying to live an unrealistic perfect life.
Today's society says "Be yourself, but fit into the norm"
Who said we have to fit into the norm? Who said we have to be like everyone else? WHY should we do this? Who Says The Cool Kids Are Cool? Who made them “cool”? What makes them "cool"? You don't have to be like everyone else. You don't have to wear the same shoes as everyone to have friends. You don't have to wear 300 Euro clothes to belong. You don't have to like what everyone else thinks is good. Don't be someone you don't want to be. Be yourself and don't apologize for it. Don't hang out with a group of people you don't like, start your own group. Differentiate yourself from others, because this is the only way to attract attention.
Today's society says "You are only smart if you get good grades"
Grades don't make you smart or stupid. I know so many people who have bad grades in school but are very intelligent. Intelligence is found in so many areas, not just in school. F. Scott Fitzgerald dropped out of college because of bad grades, but that doesn't mean he was stupid. He was a literary genius. Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish's intelligence by how well they can climb trees, they'll believe they're stupid for life.
Today's society says "This is how you have success"
It seems like there is a strict plan for how we should live our lives. It goes something like this: Get a good high school diploma, go to university, study something that can make you a lot of money, do a paid internship so that you can get a job, find a good job so that you get rich, get married, go shopping House, have children, live a normal life. But did you know that you don't have to live your life like this? It's YOUR life, live it how you want it.
Today's society says "Follow your heart! (But not like this)"
They want us to follow our hearts, to make our dreams come true, but tell us it is impossible in this day and age. Most of us are not told to do what we love, but rather to do what will earn us the most money or recognition in the end. And then they ask us what is more important: money or a happy life. They give us two options and say "Pick one". But the truth is: we can have both. Yes, you can make money and be happy at the same time. Do not let those who follow the unwritten rules treat you as if you are worth less. Follow your definition of success.
Today's society says "This is what a happy life looks like"
We all have our own ideas about a happy life. We find satisfaction in different places, because every person is different, with different backgrounds, different interests, passions and values. And just because many people think that being rich is the goal of life, it doesn't have to be your goal. Set your own goals.
Today's society says "Follow the rules, but don't think about them"
And I say the rules don't matter. You have to follow the rules, make your own rules!
Today's society says ... Much! Too much!
But don't believe everything that is said, form your own opinion. Question the rules that you thought you couldn't change because you can change them. Do what makes you happy. Live your life so that you are happy. Follow your definition of success and accept your idea of love. You don't have to live the way today's society tells you to. So start writing your own rules and break a few while you're at it. You know what they say “You're missing out on all the fun if you just follow the rules!
Carlotta Lamm (Q1c), April 8th, 2016
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